Sermon Discussion Guide - 05/25/25

May 25, 2025 6:00 AM
Sermon Discussion Guide - 05/25/25

What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20: 
Approval Won’t Make You Whole

Sermon Recap

This message tackles the deep-rooted need for approval and how it traps us in patterns of insecurity and striving. Drawing from Proverbs 29:25 - “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe” - Mark Landis shares personal stories and biblical examples (Solomon, Abraham, Peter) to highlight how chasing affirmation from others can lead us away from God’s best. Instead, true wholeness and identity come from trusting in the unconditional love of Christ.

Ice Breakers

  • What’s the funniest thing you ever did just to fit in or impress someone?
  • If your life had a theme song like a TV show, what would it be?
  • What’s a small thing that weirdly makes you feel “cool” or approved - like a certain coffee order or app?

Discussion Questions

1. Why do we chase approval even when we know it doesn’t satisfy?
  • Context: Mark shared that even as a secure adult, he still struggles with seeking people’s approval. He described past choices - like removing a “Jesus” license plate frame to avoid embarrassment.
  • Application: In what areas of your life are you still tempted to perform or conform for the sake of approval? What are the emotional or spiritual costs?
2. What is the difference between fearing man and trusting God?
  • Context: Proverbs 29:25 contrasts the fear of man with the safety found in trusting God. Solomon, despite his wisdom, fell into this snare.
  • Application: How does “fearing people” show up in your decisions, relationships, or self-image? What might it look like for you to choose trust in God instead?
3. How does the need for approval distort your sense of identity?
  • Context: The sermon highlighted how approval-seeking behaviors - like over-talking, perfectionism, or even isolation - stem from fear. Mark shared how identity rooted in Christ brings peace and safety.
  • Application: What lie about yourself might you be believing right now? What truth from Scripture helps you combat that lie?
4. How do you respond when someone withdraws approval or attention?
  • Context: Mark listed diagnostic questions, like whether loss of approval causes jealousy or sadness. These reactions can reveal misplaced dependence.
  • Application: Share a time when you felt crushed by someone’s disapproval or silence. How could shifting your focus to God's love change that experience?
5. Are you willing to trade God’s approval for someone else’s?
  • Context: The toughest diagnostic question in the sermon asked if we’re willing to disobey God just to be liked. Abraham and Peter both made choices out of fear of man.
  • Application: Have you ever compromised your values or hid your faith to keep others happy? What would it look like to walk boldly in obedience instead?

Prayer

• Pray for freedom from the need for human approval and a deeper trust in God's acceptance.
• Ask for courage to identify and confess unhealthy behaviors driven by fear or insecurity.
• Give thanks for God's unconditional love and for the safety found in Him.
• Encourage group members to share personal prayer needs and lift each other up in grace and support.

Leader Tip

This week, reinforce that your group is a place where no one has to perform to be accepted. Many people come into group time wondering if they’re liked, valued, or "enough." You get to be the kind of leader who helps them drop that burden at the door. Make eye contact, call out good things you see in them, and remind them that they are already fully loved in Christ - no performance required.